Bull Market - A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.
Bear Market - A 6 to 18-month period when the kids get no allowance and the wife gets no jewelery
Momentum Investing - The fine art of buying high and selling low.
Value Investing - The art of buying low and selling lower.
P/E ratio - The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the Market keeps crashing
Standard & Poor - Your life in a nutshell
Stock Analyst - Idiot who just downgraded your stock
Stock split - When your ex-wife and her lawyer split all your assets equally between themselves
Bear Market - A 6 to 18-month period when the kids get no allowance and the wife gets no jewelery
Momentum Investing - The fine art of buying high and selling low.
Value Investing - The art of buying low and selling lower.
P/E ratio - The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the Market keeps crashing
Standard & Poor - Your life in a nutshell
Stock Analyst - Idiot who just downgraded your stock
Stock split - When your ex-wife and her lawyer split all your assets equally between themselves
Institutional Investor - Past year investor who's now locked up in a nut house
Market Correction - The day after you buy stocks
Market Correction - The day after you buy stocks
Bounce Back Rally - The day after you sell stocks
Cash Flow - The movement your money makes as it disappears down the Toilet.
Call Option - Something people used to do with a telephone in ancient times before e-mail
Day Trader - Someone who is disloyal from 9-5
Cash Flow - The movement your money makes as it disappears down the Toilet.
Call Option - Something people used to do with a telephone in ancient times before e-mail
Day Trader - Someone who is disloyal from 9-5
Profit - Religious guy who talks to God.
Alan Greenspan - God
Bill Gates - Where God goes for a loan
Alan Greenspan - God
Bill Gates - Where God goes for a loan
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